Why are so many online Uncs and Aunties emotionally fragile, performative, and devoid of impulse control? Blame it on lead exposure. Kids born in the late '60s and '70s were at peak exposure to sweet lead paint chips and the intoxicating fumes of leaded gas at the pump. The 7 IQ points we lost may be the exact amount needed to self-regulate. Maybe it’s just as well that we are the smallest generational cohort.
I am skipping the MJ biopic. I already saw Michael become Michael in real time. Between the Broadway shows and the HBO Max doc, we know the good, the bad, and the Bubbles. But what about something MJ-adjacent? What about a biopic for the son and grandson of his mentor, Berry Gordy? Where is the LMFAO biopic? Give me Motown bloodlines, Rick Ross lawsuits, talent agent shenanigans, and royalty heists to the tune of party rock anthems. Add a BuzzBallz collab and I am shufflin' to the theater.
Watching the political rise of Spencer Pratt and his call for a repackaged, Giuliani-era “Broken Windows” policy in LA tells me exactly where the timeline is heading. Twenty-five years from now, he’ll be giving a post-election press conference for that generation’s President Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Herbert Camacho. The venue? Four Seasons Total Landscaping, now a certified historic landmark, sponsored by Gatorade Agriculture.
Jaylen Brown is the new blueprint and we need to figure out how to create more of him. A fantastic athlete, MIT Media Lab fellow, and a guy who was asked to speak at Harvard on educational inequality, he is educated, outspoken, and determined to control his own narrative. The back and forth with media has been click-bait and messy. And while Stephen A. Smith did not fire the first shot, he did ratchet it up to a toxic level. Of course he was born in 1967.
…from my privacy closet.